In the 187th verse of Surah Baqarah, Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala (exalted is He) said:
هُنَّ لِبَاسٌ لَّكُمْ وَأَنتُمْ لِبَاسٌ لَّهُنَّ
They are clothing for you and you are clothing for them. [The Noble Quran 2:187]
I have listened to many shuyookhs’ tafseer of this beautiful verse, and from what I have retained in my memory of the wisdom they shared in their lectures, I have compiled the following list of 10 simple lessons that we can learn from this verse:
- Whether you perceive it or not, you have the most intimate relationship with your clothes. However, when you get married, this intimate relationship is broken and a more intimate relationship is established with your spouse. By comparing husbands and wives as garments for each other, Allah has confirmed that the marital relationship is the most intimate relationship between two human beings, and it is therefore sacred too.
- Garment beautifies you. When Allah blesses you with a spouse, life becomes beautiful.
- The beauty of a garment wears out. So is the beauty of marriage. Like the shine of a new garment, the initial euphoria and excitement of marriage eventually wear off with time. And that is when the reality of marriage kicks in and the challenge begins. By comparing husbands and wives as garments for each other, Allah is already telling us to be ready for this marital challenge.
- When you buy a piece of garment, you buy the right size. Similarly, when you look for a spouse, you will have to find the one who will be compatible with you. Like you know what you are looking for before you buy a garment, you should also be clear about your marital goals and objectives before you look for a spouse and get married.
- Garment protects you from the sun and the cold. Similarly, your spouse protects your chastity and gaze from the fitnah of opposite gender.
- Garment hides your bodily faults and imperfections from public. Since Allah has made the husband and the wife garment for each other, they are obliged to hide each other’s faults and weaknesses from public.
- You wash your garments to remove dirt from them. Similarly, you always need to forgive your spouse and release your grudges by rising above your ego and find ways to rejuvenate your marital relationship.
- Depending on weather conditions, you wear different types of clothes. You wear certain types of clothes on winter and other types of clothes on summer. Since you are the garment of your spouse, you will have to change and adapt depending on the mood of your spouse. If she is angry, you cannot be angry at the same time. You will have to keep your cool and try to soothe her anger.
- Has it not happened that you bought a garment and your love for it grew with time? I bet it did. Sometimes we grew to like a garment so much that even when our moms want to discard it, we protest. Similar thing is supposed to happen within a marriage. If you find the right partner and work hard for your marriage, the love for your spouse should continue grow over the years. An example here is the love of the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) for his wife Khadija (May Allah be pleased with her). His (ﷺ) love for her grew with time and when she died, he (ﷺ) was so saddened he did not smile for months.
- Do you want to learn to talk about relationships and sexuality without being too open or vulgar? Study this verse.